Archive | March 2020

Haven’t I Seen This Movie?

JudyandBear

Judy Parker and my favorite cat Bear

I’ve been housebound during this stressful time of COVID: 19 and Judy is one of those special friends who have stayed in touch. She has been checking in by email every single day. What would I do without friends like her? Thank you Judy and also to the many others who have not forgotten me.

Judy Parker is a brilliant, published author and an avid reader who contributes much to our book club. I am fortunate to have her in my life.

Thank you too, Judy, for allowing me to share your work with my readers and to love your cat Bear.

Muriel2017

Lucky me.

P.S. Please note the spaces between Judy’s poem’s lines are because of my lack of expertise with technology. Please disregard them. Thank you, Muriel

 

Haven’t I Seen This Movie?

By Judy Parker

Small town or big city. Lonely cabin or

LakeMIchiganbeach

Michigan Lake beach. I was there

dark lane. South Pacific Island.

Sandy beach on a sunny day.
Cue ominous music. Where is the
cheerleader? The old geezer? The jock?
Somebody gives warning but the
warnings are mocked. “Run away! Hide!
Stay in your homes!”
The monster creeps closer,
slithers or slides, stomps on the cities
or eats the new bride. And everyone parties,

fatcheer

Where is the cheerleader?

unaware of the screams, until they’re
the victims, and it’s their blood that streams
over the cobbles or down the morgue drain.
Finally it’s over, the movie is done,
and no one’s too worried about who is gone.
It’s only a movie. It’s all in fun. Monsters
In movies will leave us alone. But the monsters
we face now will follow us home. This isn’t
a movie. It just feels like it’s one.

Jkp

goodtheatre

The movie is done…

20pedjock

The Jock?

COVID-19 Projects…

Yup. I’m not seeing anyone. I’m not going to Terra’s for breakfast Muriel2017these days. I’m not eating lunch out with friends. I’m really being good and staying home which isn’t awful, except I’m not getting any hugs either. Everyone will owe me some!

Ladyonbike

watching Jackie Chan

 

I’ve walked each day – alone, along deserted side streets. I’ve been on my Exercycle daily too. I’m doing 17 minutes per sitting and plan to get it to 20 minutes soon. Am thoroughly enjoying the Jackie Chan DVD ‘The Accidental Spy’ which I watch while pedaling. Can’t wait to get back to it after I finish this…

 

My first project was to get my tax papers in order. Oh joys! Still, I knew if I got it out of the way, I’d feel really noble. Yeah! That took two whole mornings. Whew!

taxwhite

Taxes. Whew!

Then yesterday, I decided to organize my long neglected box of

Photo on 2020-03-19 at 14.33

Plastic containers organized for now

plastic containers. They’re kept on a pull out shelf in my kitchen. They’re convenient but were, as usual, in a holy mess. I don’t often think reorganizing them is important.

 

I planned to get rid of many of them,

Photo on 2020-03-19 at 14.31

4 to go

but ended up selecting only four to give to the Senior Centre when it reopens. (They serve lunches and those who can’t make their own meals often buy extra food to take home. Sometimes they forget containers so mine may come in handy.)

Photo on 2020-03-19 at 14.29

Many don’t fit each other

 

There were plenty of lonely tops and bottoms which didn’t fit anything, like those single socks we accumulate when we do laundry. I’ve got plenty of those. Do you want any?

 

Its nice to see all those containers neatly stacked in their carton. But if you come over three days from now, I assure you they’ll be in a big mess again. The only way I can keep them looking so neat would be to NEVER, EVER use them again!

finishedtaxpapers

My junk drawer? What treasures will I find…

 

Now, next project will be my kitchen junk drawer. I wonder what treasures I’ll find there….

A sense of humor?

Muriel2017

I’d been there before. Several times. Still, when leaving, I headed in the wrong direction. I do stuff like that — very often.

Andrew and I were at a local hospital where I’d had an appointment with my hand surgeon. I wasn’t sure what the doctor would do about that troublesome hand, so I asked Andrew to come with me ‘just in case’.

As I was leading the poor guy astray, he gently reminded me we had to go in the opposite direction.

Andrew20206

Andrew looking serious. (He hates taking pictures.)

‘I told you I have no sense of direction,’ I laughed, ‘You can believe it.’

‘A sense of humor is much more important,’ Andrew responded. He is SO wonderfully clever.

cutequestion

Where am I???

I burst out laughing. I do that a lot. As for a sense of direction, forget it. Turn me around in my bedroom and I probably wouldn’t find my own bed.

Andrew is right. My crazy sense of humor is helpful. I had just had the doctor cracking up because I asked him to marry me. (He said he would except he loves his wife.)

Then he showed me videos of his new baby, born one day before my birthday, and his little girl. He has told me I can ALWAYS get in to see him, which is terrific for me with my  arthritic hands.

betterlaughingdr

My doctor cracked up when I asked him to marry me.

I often get great service because of my nutty humor, bus drivers remember me and smile when I climb aboard and make sure I’m seated before they restart the bus. Busy professionals try to fit me in, and, admittedly, I sometimes take advantage of that.

This year, my wonderful, caring family doctor gave ME a Christmas present! I’ve made her laugh often, but she put up with me in tears when I was very dizzy. I adore her….

During the present crisis, I’ve agreed to not be stubborn and I’m staying in because everyone is reminding me how old I am. Old?

Well okay I AM old! And I tell my loved ones I intend to stick around until the last cheque/check bounces!

Happy birthday to you…

funnykadyIt won’t surprise you that I buy an old-fashioned appointment book yearly. Through the years, the cost went from $5 to $20. On page ‘X’ of the phone section, I list all birthdays of friends or family who matter. (I haven’t any friends yet whose names begin with X.)

betterbooks

 

 

I want to send each a card on their special day, but it hasn’t quite worked out that way though I’ve tried various methods of getting the job done.

yayaya

 

One year I took extra time to write each name in a week before their birthday so I’d be reminded in time. Clever, no? No! It didn’t work.

cuteanimal

 

 

The next year, I improved my methodology by buying all the cards ahead of time, filling them out, sealing the envelopes and stacking them on my desk after writing the date they SHOULD be mailed on where the stamp would go. I thought that was brilliant. Wouldn’t you?

 

cutemailWARNING: DON’T TRY THIS AT HOME: Today, no self-respecting mail carrier will deliver mail within a week anyway. They’d probably be evicted from the union or banished from their church or something even more sinister. In any case, by the end of THAT year, there was a stack of paid-for cards still waiting to be mailed. How that happened I’ll never know.

Well, here it is March and I haven’t acknowledged anyone’s birthday except Joe, whose birthday is impossible to forget, and my Chandra, whose birthday I remembered this January although I forgot it last year and she still forgave me.

 

So, here’s what’s gonna happen. I’m gonna wish every one of them Happy Birthday right here and now. Here goes…..

Happy Birthday to youuuuu Chris, Robert, Alison, Judy, David, Vinson, Donna, Brian, Kevin, Amy, Rafi, Susan, Remy, Shirley, Diane, Naomi, Rebecca, Andrew, Trudy and Michael. All done!

 

Birthday-Cake

 

By the way, I celebrate my own birthday for six months before and six months after the actual date, so if you want to treat me to a birthday breakfast, brunch, lunch or dinner, yer on anytime. And, if you’re reading this, you have my permission to celebrate your birthday for six months before and six months afterwards as well.

So HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUUUUUUUU!

balloons